Woodge ambles through life with a spring in his step and a tongue in his cheek (although bacon is preferred). He does geeky stuff with computers¹ and spends his free time acquiescing to his kids' demands for rough-housing and make-up stories. These days his son Luke (born Feb '02) is obsessed with money and its accumulation. Otherwise Woodge is busy trying to keep his daughter Kajsa² (born Dec '04) from stepping on his neck while he's prone on the couch. Occasionally Woodge gets to have adult conversations with his gorgeous wife Tina but their kids like to keep that to a minimum. Most of the time, though, Woodge is confined to a cubicle and kept separate from polite society.
Woodge finds 95% of television to be abhorrent crap and reads lots of books instead (but probably not the crap you read). Sometimes Woodge geeks out with ginormous computer-related textbooks. He thinks carrying these tomes around make him look smart. What a maroon! He digs fantasy books too, a not-so-guilty pleasure.
Woodge is a fool for movies, makes his own fridge magnets, and occasionally eats too much cheese. His postcard collection includes this one, a favorite. Some would argue that Woodge's brain is not normal, but he just scoffs at such nonsense and continues barking. Any time left over from his various frivolous pursuits is spent filing — filing?! Ha! More like sleeping! On the train! With his mouth open and people looking at him funny.
Woodge is charming, polite, and a good speller. He's a fabulous parent and doesn't smoke. He keeps swearing to a minimum because he deems it crass. So, yeah, he thinks he's better than you are. What a pompous jerk he is! Someone ought to open a can of whup-ass on his smarmy little self. I bet he'd run away screaming like a little girl.
Woodge has been tweaking woodge
com since the summer of 1999. He lives north of Boston with his perfect family and would like to get out and play more tennis. But first he'd like to take a nap. Woodge is self-medicated, mostly with beer.
Enjoy Woodge responsibly.
More scrofulous filth:
- Woodge's brain
- 100 ways to be like Woodge (You know you want to.)
² Kajsa is pronounced KYE-sah and rhymes with NICE-ah. It's a Swedish name.